My Slutty Pie

Oh, you dirty dog, you.  I knew that title and picture would get your attention.

But alas, that's what you are getting today:  A little looksie at my slutty pie.

It was the boyfriend's birthday, and like every other year i wanted to create a fun treat for him.  When he saw what i was up to he politely suggested i not worry about it and we get a cake or dessert out.

Hmmm, i thought....since when aren't you down with my bakin' bebe?  

But then i came to realize that i'm a complete tweaker.  I can't help but tweak each recipe i find and try to enhance it by replacing crap ingredients with something uber healthy.  I suppose he didn't want another year of protein powder truffles, sponge-y low fat pumpkin cupcakes made with banana to replace the oil, or a walnut based cake sans the fluff-worthy flour.  What he wanted was what he considered traditional dessert/birthday foods- pies and cakes made with oil, sugar, flour, eggs, butter, and love.

Feelings aside, I get it and it is his birthday, so i thought i'd oblige and make him what my girlfriend referred to as a slutty cake (or in this case a slutty pie).  After pinning a bunch of recipes, i stumbled upon a raw vegan recipe for coconut cream pie (he'd been eyeing a coconut pie at the market for months now).  It was this video that inspired my recipe, and they made it look, well......easy as pie.


Word of CAUTION to all you waistline watchers:

This is by far the easiest to make and easiest to eat, most delicious, AND MOST FATTENING Coconut Cream Pie ever!  It is NOT low fat or low calorie, but it is made from wholesome ingredients.  If you are on a diet, DO NOT MAKE THIS CAKE FOR YOURSELF OR ANYONE ELSE FOR THAT MATTER!!!  It's impossible not to indulge in it.

....AND that's why she's considered a slutty pie.  This pie puts out with major seductive mouth feel.  She's an incredible tease:  one taste won't be enough.  Plus she's just the right amount of sweetness, softness, and decadence, therefore making her the perfect amount of pie sluttiness.

My Slutty Coconut Cream Pie will take you about 20 minutes from start to end (don't let my long winded instructions fool you).  Perhaps i should call it afternoon delight instead???

The Flirtatious Pie Crust ingredients:

3 cups shredded coconut
pinch salt
dash cinnamon
1 tsp vanilla extract
pitted medjool dates (about 1 cup)

The Sensual Pie Filling ingredients:

one 15 oz can full fat organic coconut milk (or blend the flesh from a few coconuts with a little coco water)
meat/flesh from one thai baby coconut
1/3 cup melted coconut oil
pinch of salt
tsp of vanilla extract
pitted medjool dates (about 6 big ones)
coconut water

To make your slutty crust:

Fit your food processor with an S blade.  Put the shredded coconut in with salt, vanilla extract, and dash of cinnamon.  Turn the processor on and drop in pitted medjool dates one at a time.  You want the crust to stick together when you pinch it, but easily break apart when you tear that pinched piece in two.  Check occasionally as you go, this will help you determine how many dates you need.

To make the slutty filling:

Add canned coconut milk, meat from one coconut, melted coconut oil, pitted dates, vanilla, and pinch of salt to your blender/Vitamix.  Add coconut water to meet the consistency of a very thick smoothie.  (I used about 3/4 of the water the coconut provided....most likely it was a little more than a cup).

How to finish up your slutty pie:

Grease a pie pan with coconut oil - this is important so the crust doesn't stick.

Dump the contents of food processor into the greased pie pan.  Distribute evenly and from the center out use your fist to gently press the crust down.  Use your fingers along the sides to help coax the crust up the sides of the pan.

Pour the filling into the crust.  Cover with more shredded coconut and optionally shredded dark chocolate and freeze for a few hours.  Remove from freezer and allow to thaw.  (Doesn't take long).  Enjoy.  Store remainder in freezer or fridge.


Oh btw's,  i didn't mention to the boyfriend that this pie was raw vegan until he gobbled it down.   I suppose he just kinda-sorta liked it.  This is what the pie looked like the next day at noon.....

nearly gone!  LOL.  

Hardly even enough left for me to photog for ye ole' blog.  Perhaps i need to have a slutty pie intervention with him???